01.Parenting through professional parenting

Parental children”Also known as“Small adult type children”，It refers to the inversion of parent-child relationships that occur in families and parents from a young age，Since childhood, not only can't I be a child peacefully，Children who are also forced to play the role of parents。

Parents of such children have lower levels of psychological development，Psychological immaturity，In emotional control、Insufficient understanding of others and social functions，taWe are not aware of the needs of our children，contrary，Due to one's own lack and some functional deficiencies，Will unconsciously shift the responsibility of meeting their own needs onto their own children，Subconsciously allowing one's own child to assume the role of a psychological parent，In clinical psychology, there is a proprietary term called parenting specialization。

There are two main types of professionalization，One is emotional and emotional，This is particularly abundant，It's just that parents can't digest their emotions，Allowing children to take on the responsibility of regulating their emotional function as containers。One is instrumental，Similar toPoor children take over early on，Premature putting children under the pressure of working and surviving in the adult world。

In this article, we may mainly discuss the former type more：Forced to become parents psychologically during the growth processEmotions and emotionsContainer for，Helping parents regulate their emotions，Maintaining the psychological function of parents，The problems that may arise from experiencing such nurturing and how to heal oneself。

 02.The potential problems that parenting may bring

Based on my clinical experience observation，Children who have been forced to serve as containers for parents since childhood，There are often the following characteristics：

1、Highly empathetic towards others，Extremely ignoring oneself

Children from families with inverted parent-child relationships often have strong empathy for others，Very attentive to and considerate of others' feelings，Very considerate of others，howevertaPeople often overlook themselves extremely，Even without a concept of self，seemtaThe value of our existence is to satisfy others，Always prioritize the needs of others over one's own needs，Skilled in taking care of others，Excessive tolerance and concession towards people and things，Very empathetic towards others，But I don't empathize with myself，And sometimes they are very demanding of themselves。

in addition，tTheir obedience is very high，Many times, without hesitation, one obeys others，This is also a habitual reaction of revolving around others since childhood。

2、I'm not sure what I want

I don't know what I want，taPeople often have no knowledge of their own preferences，I often have no concept of how to spend my life。

But that doesn't mean they have nothing to do all day，contrary，Many of these children have been busy since childhood due to the expectations imposed on them by their parents，Many of them are even academic achievers，Good academic performance，But after being admitted to college, I am not clear about what I want。Or find out after work that this is not what you want，Only then will I reflect on what I want。